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Glen Rock Needs More of These


The Dodge Challenger – despite being huge, loud, and hopelessly impractical – is one of the great vehicles of all time, and our town needs more of them.

Check that….  The Dodge Challenger is one of the great vehicles of all time because it’s huge, loud, and hopelessly impractical, and therefore our town needs more of them.

Despite the many and persistent complaints to the contrary, Glen Rock doesn’t have a problem with big things crammed into small spaces.  If you wake up tomorrow morning and decide you’re sick of having so much lawn and instead want your house to take up pretty much every square foot of your property, I’m certain you’ll find a way to get it done.

And speaking of lawns, the fact that you can’t sleep past 8am on a weekday because nearly every lawn in town is being mowed at the same time is testament to the fact that GR doesn’t have a problem with excess noise, neither.

And if you can afford the luxury of having your lawn mowed in this town, you shouldn’t wince at the impractical luxury of owning a Challenger.  Heck, you can probably lease the fully-loaded R/T model I drove not long ago and still not have to drag out your ancient walk-behind.

I won’t argue that the R/T, in spite of it’s weight, height, and massive engine, is actually a fuel-efficient car.  All modern cars are fuel-efficient if you have the appropriate driving style.  Others will argue that last sentence far better than I ever will.

But even if it were still the gas-guzzler it was in the ’70s, the best argument for owning this bruiser was made on the spare-wheel cover I saw recently on a jacked-up Jeep; it reads “Your Kids Won’t Remember 39.9 MPG”.  They will remember the sound of that V8 when you tap the throttle.  And by the way, that’s all you have to do to get that sound, so you can have one of those “Keep Kids Alive Drive 25” signs on that finely-shaven lawn with a Challenger in your driveway and keep the dirty looks to a minimum.

Not that you’ll care about any dirty looks looks you might get – in any situation – once you’re behind the wheel of this battle-beast.  When you punch… ‘scuse me, tap… that throttle, you will laugh your butt off.  Every time.  It’s lunacy.  The fun kind.  And the whole world – not just our little home – could really use more of that.

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